Monday, July 18, 2011

I Belive in Kindness

Rude:  1. being in a rough or unfinished state; 2. lacking refinement or delicacy (offensive in manor or action); 3. marked by or suggestive of lack of training or skill; 4. occurring abruptly or disconcertingly

Discourteous:  1. lacking courtesy

Unkind:  1. not pleasing or mild; 2. lacking in kindness or sympathy

I believe in kindness.  I believe that when dealing with others, to treat them the way you would want to be treated in the same situation.  I do not believe in creating unnecessary stress on another person when a situation is already stressful.

I had a situation this morning arise in which a woman was rude, discourteous and unkind to me in front of my four year old son.  I took him to his dentist appointment this morning.  I have become concerned he may have a couple cavities forming and I want to get them taken care of as soon as possible.

The dentist office we are assigned to by the insurance company has a policy that they call 24 hours in advance of your appointment to confirm it.  If they cannot reach you, they cancel your appointment.  When I got to the office this morning to check my son in, I found out they could not reach us (they had an old phone number on file) and canceled his appointment.  This in itself frustrated me, but what made matters worse was the way the front desk women spoke to me.

As soon as she saw the appointment was canceled, her tone immediately changed and she started speaking down to me.  She spoke to me in a way that made me feel like I was an idiot for coming in when my appointment had been canceled.  When I expressed my frustration with the situation (in a very calm way) she shrugged her shoulders at me and told me there were no more available appointments until September!! She also told me I could sit around and wait to see if the next appointment showed up (literally the words "you can sit around and wait" came out of her mouth). 

I was absolutely dumb founded that she was being so hostile towards me.  My son was already tense at the thought of seeing the dentist and I was trying to remain as calm as possible.  At one point, I had enough of her tone and called her out on her rude behavior.  Again, I did this in a calm way as to not upset my son and try to keep my composure in front of him.  I did not want to fly off the handle and show a bad example.  The woman seemed shocked that I had called her out on her bad behavior, but nothing changed.  She just kept repeating over and over the office policy on appointment cancellations.

This is a reminder to us all that it's not what you say, it's how you say it.  No matter who is at fault in any given situation, if you are in a service industry and have an upset customer it's really better to try and temper things rather than add fuel to the fire.  If she had been more apologetic (even though it wasn't really the office's fault) that the appointment had been canceled because they couldn't contact us the confirm, I still would have been frustrated but at least I could have seen the situation for what it was.  Instead she made things worse by being unwilling to show kindness while trying to find the best solution.  In fact she didn't try to help resolve the problem, she sat in her chair staring at my while I tried to decide what to do.  I just wish she had been more sympathetic to my frustration and tried to help be part of the solution instead of the problem.

In the end, I was able to get his appointment rescheduled for early August (as an appointment seemed to magically appear on her computer screen) and he has also been put on the cancellation list. I left feeling beat up, abused and at lost for words trying to explain to my son why he wasn't going to see the dentist today.

Please remember to always show kindness as you never know a person's current situation and....

stay tuned.....

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Why Didn't You Wait?!

That's what I heard from my bestie after I tried to explain what had happened to my haircut after bringing in a diagram of the "Middy Long" haircut to a salon.  The middy haircut was created by Ivan Anderson, a hair stylist for Warner Bros. Studios during the 1940's. It became very popular during WWII, as women started wearing their hair shorter trying to be more patriotic.

So in jumping the gun to get my haircut because I am an incredibly impatient person when it comes to my hair, I did two things wrong...
  1. I did not got to a stylist I really trusted.  My bestie has been doing my hair for 10 years now.  In fact she's been doing my hair since she was in cosmetology school!  So when I tried to explain what went wrong and how my hair was cut, I heard "Why didn't you wait?! You should have waited until you could come over."  Which to her credit is totally true!!  Instead I had gotten impatient and found someone on a whim.  I also should have known when neither she nor another person in the salon understood the diagram I brought in, it was time to go or at least nix the middy until I could go to see my bestie.  Which leads me to my next point....
  2. You really need to do your homework on the middy.  Haircutting techniques were very different in the 1940's to now.  Everything from the way the hair is sectioned to the direction layers are cut are very very different.  If you do not do your homework and really understand how the middy haircut is achieved you won't be able to explain it to your stylist and you won't be happy with the outcome.  More is needed then finding a copy of the diagram online!  I highly recommend you purchase Creative Hairshaping & Hairstyling by Ivan Anderson.  I had to purchase it from as I could not find a book store that carried it.  It was only around $21 with shipping, so there isn't a huge investment.  The book has all the diagrams plus written instructions on how the haircut is to be done.  It also has all the variations if you want a longer version for the top and sides of the hair.
So my bestie did the best she could with what was left of my hair.  I am now beginning the process of growing out the mistakes and continuing my experiment with a true 1940's haircut. 

Why would I want a 1940's haircut?....Well simply put, it really makes achieving the hairstyles from that era much easier than with a modern haircut.  As things progress I will be updating you all.

On the plus side, since so much of my hair got cut off, the majority of the damaged hair is also gone!  No more super dry ends.

Stay tuned my lovelies.....

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Stay tuned...

So I've been thinking for a months about taking my blog to a new level....that is, taking it to YouTube.  For several years I have tried to figure out something to have that's just for me.  Being a stay-at-home mom and housewife is rewarding and my choice, but it can also be quite lonely at times.  I often feel like there is something missing in my life and I haven't quite figured out what to fill that void with.

I have gone back and forth about starting a YouTube channel.  I follow several people or guru's on YouTube and have wondered if I really had anything more to contribute that people might be interested in.  I have also been concerned with seeing what some have gone through with the amount of negativity and spam received.  It seemed to be very emotionally exhausting and I wasn't sure for a while if that was something I wanted to invite into my life.

Still contemplating all of these things, I am leaning more towards starting my channel.  I have decided to combine two loves of mine...all things vintage/retro and shopping!  It will be mostly reviews and whether I consider them to be a "splurge" or "steal."  I don't think I'll be doing tutorial's.  I feel like there are some amazing guru's out there that do a much better job than I could ever do with vintage/retro hair and makeup.

So as of right now, I am still working out the details.

Stay tuned....